


the flowers i grew up loving (that i learnt to hate)

by kwoncity



Series: our love is made of stardust & the faint glowing of the moon [9]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Hanahaki Disease, M/M, and theres a little more sentiment to the whole disease, but its unrequited, plus the surgery goes a lil wrong, soonyoung and jihoon are childhood bestfs, soonyoung ends up falling in love with jihoon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-02
Updated: 2019-01-02
Packaged: 2019-10-02 20:57:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17271011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kwoncity/pseuds/kwoncity
Summary: jihoon's always had a love for a certain type of flowers, soonyoung's horrified when he finds himself coughing up that same type of flowers.





	the flowers i grew up loving (that i learnt to hate)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ash poh!](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=ash+poh%21).



> if you want to know my inspiration for this, it came to be while reading a poetry book.

**the first time** they met, they were in 1st grade. jihoon had joined in the middle of the semester and soonyoung was the overly enthusiastic kid who couldn't seem to understand why jihoon had opted to stay in the room rather than run around in the playground.

it seems, that wasn't the only thing soonyoung couldn't understand about jihoon.

soonyoung couldn't understand why the only flowers jihoon was willing to bring to the hospital were baby's breaths. soonyoung had broken his leg the day before and jihoon spent every second of the day by soonyoung's hospital bed.

soonyoung couldn't understand why jihoon had chosen baby's breaths once again for his grandmother's funeral, why jihoon had hugged the bouquet of flowers so tightly while tears streamed down his cheeks.

soonyoung couldn't understand why jihoon bought seokmin baby's breaths in freshman year to confess his feelings. (why baby's breaths and why seokmin? why not soonyoung?)

but one thing soonyoung could understand was when jihoon hugged soonyoung tight one night, crying after seokmin broke his heart. words of "thank you, soonyoung." and "you're the best friend i could ever ask for." because, yeah, no matter how strong their relationship grew, they would always just be friends.

but growing up with these flowers, soonyoung had come to love them. it was a habit that had grown on him to always pick baby's breaths first. not only was baby's breaths jihoon's favourite flower, it had come to be soonyoung's as well.

-

  
it was on that fateful day when soonyoung had chosen to hang out with wonwoo, a family friends of his.

it wasn't unusual, they sat in wonwoo's living room, playing some video games.

it started with the coughing. soonyoung dropped the controller as he started a coughing fit, his chest heaved heavily up and down.

soon, he gagged. and as much as wonwoo would've liked to help him, he couldn't. wonwoo stood there, wide-eyed and frozen in shock. as soon as he had recovered from the shock, he sprung onto his feet. wonwoo hit soonyoung's back multiple times, trying to get out whatever was stuck in there.

soonyoung coughed and he coughed, then, baby's breaths fell out of his mouth.

what? soonyoung didn't understand. he was now feeling alright, give or take the little pain in his chest.

"hanahaki..." wonwoo whispered, his voice laced with disbelief.

"how... who?" he turned to soonyoung.

however, soonyoung didn't seem to understand what wonwoo had meant, "what?"

"hanahaki. unrequited love. the flowers bloom in your lungs when you love someone who doesn't love you back."

"so... there's flowers in my lungs?"

"yeah. who is it?"

"who is what?"

"the person you love, the one that doesn't love you back?"

soonyoung looked down at the flowers in his hands, there was only one possible explanation.

"i think it's... jihoon."

 

"you... like jihoon?"

 

"yeah, and it only makes sense that it's baby's breaths. but... will this go away? like a crush, will the flowers go away?"

 

"i'm afraid not, you either remove the flowers along with your feelings for him, or you die."

 

"how... do i remove them then?"

 

"surgery," wonwoo said simply. "there's no other way. i urge you to get it."

 

"i think i should too, but... not now."

 

"your decision, but please, don't let yourself die."

 

"i won't."

 

-

 

as if the god were trying to mock him, the second time it happened, he was with jihoon.

once again, he coughed and coughed and coughed. but rather than letting jihoon help him, he held up one hand, leaving jihoon with no choice but to let him be.

"what...? are you alright?"

"i'm fine."

"what... what was that?"

"hanahaki. it's nothing much. don't bother."

 

"okay, if you insist. but if anything is wrong you've got to tell me, okay?"

 

soonyoung nodded. oh, sometimes he hated how easy it was to fall in love with jihoon.

 

-

 

"soonyoung, we need to talk."

 

"no, no we don't."

 

"yes, we do. let's go."

 

jihoon dragged soonyoung to the back of the building, and normally soonyoung would've been able to protest, but the disease had made him too week.

 

"you've gotten weaker," jihoon noticed. "is it the hanahaki?"

 

soonyoung shook his head, "i told you, i'm fine. you don't have anything to worry about."

 

"i'm not stupid, soonyoung. i searched up hanahaki. unrequited love huh?"

 

soonyoung slowly nodded, "yeah."

 

"may i ask, who?"

 

soonyoung shook his head, "you don't want to know."

 

"soonyoung, i don't want you to die. please, get the surgery."

 

"i will. just not yet."

 

"why?"

 

"why? because, it is such a blissful feeling, being in love. sometimes, i fear i'll never find another man that i'll love."

 

"...who?"

 

"it's you..."soonyoung admits, he feels as if an arrow had just be lunged into his throat. he needed to let it  out somehow, he can't keep it in anymore.

he breaks.

"it hurts so badly! because i am utterly in love with you, but you? you keep pursuing a another man who doesn't even care! but that's fine, because i'll always just be your best friend."

 

"soonyoung, i... i never knew."

 

"i'll get the surgery tomorrow. i don't want to live like this anymore."

 

-

 

the next day, wonwoo had come to pick up soonyoung to get to the hospital. when jihoon had tried to get on the car as well, wonwoo stopped him. "i think it's best if you don't go, it'll be easier on him."

 

and as much as jihoon had wanted to protest, he knew he shouldn't, because it was for soonyoung.

 

the sugery was quick, it was painless, and it went well.

 

the doctors came out of the room, "mr jeon?" the doctors inquired, "are you here with mr kwon?"

 

  
"yes, i am," wonwoo stood up, "is he okay."

  
"he's fine, but something went wrong with our surgery. he's not hurt or anything."

"what happened!? are you sure he's fine?"

"he is, but rather than just removing the feelings, his entire memory of that man was removed. he wouldn't remember his existence."

"that's possible?"

"sadly yes, we didn't know it could actually happen till now."

"doc, you have to restore the memories, it's his best friend."

"i'm sorry. i wouldn't be able to restore it now, but over time, he'll remember again."

"okay, thank you."

-

imagine the heartbreak on jihoon's face when he was told soon young didn't remember a thing about him, imagine the confusion on soonyoung's face when jihoon had run up to hug him, imagine the guilt on wonwoo's face when soonyoung returned to the apartment and was shocked to see a roommate.

and everything won't ever be the same again. sure, soonyoung might remember it later on, but nothing would ever be the same again.


End file.
